Updated: Aug 20, 2020
In honor of World Heart Day <3
Oh how I love and hate you.You have brought so much joy and insanity to my life. I honestly have no idea what life is like without you. And I don't want to know.
Because I have learned to appreciate all of the gifts CHD has given me and the biggest gift in my opinion is the WISDOM, knowledge, and will to fight.
Because of you, my CHD friends and I have a world view, appreciation for life, and understanding most take 50+ years to see. We are just born ready to conquer the world. We were put here for reasons that will take our entire lives to figure out, and that's the best part for me -- the journey.
Even through the hell CHD brings, I am extremely grateful for the physical, mental, spiritual journey that having CHD has brought me on. It has forced me to see sides of myself and others I may have never gotten to know. I have both enjoyed and been terrified of exploring every part of who I am through my adulthood and trying to figure out what life is like being an adult with complex CHD. Yet afraid or not, CHD has taught me to face fears head on and keep walking through the fire even if it burns because as I now know, on the other side is freedom and a wisdom that I cannot explain.
What better way to test who you (and others) truly are than to constantly be faced with death? It hasn't been all sunshine, kittens, and rainbows, but it does put everything in life in a higher contrast with brighter colors.
All of the mental struggles, what having CHD does to my relationships, hospital stays, ER visits, procedures, and the not knowing is why I hate you. However, I never thought I'd say this either, but I am enjoying getting to know my weird body and self more and more which makes the bad a tiny bit easier to manage.
I love you, I hate you, I don't want to know what life is like without you. Maybe that's weird, but that's me.
Happy Heart Day friends. ❤💃🤘
Love, Stephanie HLHS: 32 yrs old www.chdlegacy.com Educate.Inspire.Heal.